You’re a mum who wants to do the best she can to connect with her child and to be a great example for her child by living the best and most fulfilled life that she can, but you find yourself losing the plot as life is crazy busy.
You want to make progress with work that matters to you either in your own creative business or in the workplace and you want to be THERE as a mother, but the two don’t seem to be fitting into one Google cal weekly plan.
There are just not enough color options on there for ALL the things, even when you use the green color you’re not keen on.
Every morning it feels like more and more of a struggle to get through the day.
You know that you should make more time for yourself, but that never happens. You know you want to be more patient, but some days it all gets too much and you feel like the kid who has to get in the car seat and just doesn’t want to!
You don’t want to just have to always buckle up and get on with it.
You’d like to feel more relaxed, calmer and to take better care of yourself.
You want to be able to have the energy to connect with your child in positive ways more of the time.
You’d like to grow into work that you LOVE and to make time to pursue creative dreams that you have long put to one side.
You want to be the best version of you and the best mother you can be, but without constantly putting yourself under pressure to be perfect.
You’ve tried more chocolate as the solution to all of this and even the best Green and Black’s truffles have not fixed everything (you knew they wouldn’t really).
Back-to-back episodes of ‘The Crown,’ and ‘Downton Abbey,’ only leave you bleary-eyed the next day and thinking that life would be so much easier if one had a butler and lady’s maid.
Hi, I’m Deborah Chalk
I’m a life coach for busy mums, moms or primary caregivers of children who want to help their child reach their potential, but feel like they’re failing.
Juggling life, family and work leaves them no time to connect with their child the way they want to.
I help them take charge of their schedule and create me-time and time with their child so that both they and their child can thrive.
The key themes of my work with clients are:
- Success, that’s fulfilling and sustainable
- Connection with your child
I’ve been reading self-help and coaching books since I was 13. I love to learn and I was really shy, awkward and was bullied at school. I felt like I needed all the help that I could get.
I was very hard on myself and highly responsible. The ‘be a good girl’ thing wasn’t working for me. I was doing what other people wanted for me rather than what I wanted.
I landed up in a job in a Merchant Bank in London and I realised that there was no way I wanted to live my working life there and then retire one day with a carriage clock.
The Navy and teaching were the other ‘responsible’ career choices that I made and neither of them felt right for me. I was unprepared for abseiling down cliffs and nights on Dartmoor in the Navy and I told myself it was beyond my capabilities, so I left.
I was tired and stressed in my teaching job. Even though I was doing a great job as a teacher, I could never accept that. I didn’t allow myself to feel good about my work. I felt that I was failing, even though I wasn’t.
I got married and my husband’s job meant we moved ten times to new parts of England. I would just get settled somewhere and we would move again.
I moved from teaching job to teaching job and each time I felt like I was starting over as each school needed new planning, new ways of doing things and I needed to earn the respect of the parents and pupils all over again.
I worked through Julia Cameron’s book ‘The Artist’s Way’ and started to listen to what it was that I wanted in my life. This was something I’d never done before.
I took courses in floristry and photography and did a second degree in Art History and Creative Writing. I took piano lessons. I was allowing myself to be the creative person I had been all along, but I still couldn’t figure out what to do with my life.
I worked with a coach and she helped me to recognise that I had been reading coaching books all along and was passionate about coaching and self-development. I hadn’t been allowing myself to train as a coach as I thought the training was too expensive and coaching sounded kind of ‘flaky’.
It wasn’t one of those ‘responsible jobs’ that the good girl part of me thought I had to have.
I became a mother at 36. I’d been married to my husband for ten years at that point but had never felt settled enough to have a child. I was always more focused on figuring out what to be, ‘when I grow up’ – even though I was already grown up!
I found mothering a real challenge. We were in hospitals with jaundice, febrile convulsions, and ear infections. A spinal tap and intravenous antibiotics and ambulance trips really amped up my stress and fear levels. I was tired out as my husband was working long hours away from home and I felt really lonely.
I turned to coaching for help and joined Carrie Contey’s Evolve program for Conscious Parents. I learnt how to handle storms of emotions that I was having and that my child was having.
Eventually, I built the emotional stability and confidence to do my coach training. In 2013, I took Martha Beck’s Wayfinder Life Coach training. I allowed myself to do something my heart had been calling me to.
I built a business where I can work from home and have balance and creativity in my life. I can go to sports matches at school when I plan for them and am enjoying taking singing lessons. I look after myself with good nutrition, exercise, meditation, time in nature and sleep.
I generally feel good when I wake up in the morning. I no longer have the Sunday night dread that I used to feel about work and instead, I feel on a much more even keel.
I’m not perfect as a mother, as that isn’t possible for anyone, but I do know that I am doing a much better job because I have work that I enjoy, more self-compassion and self-care.
My coaching experience has involved me working to coach and mentor other coaches, to coach mothers who work and I’ve also worked as part of two coaching teams.
I worked as a career coach for Alison Cardy’s Career Coaching Team (Washington based) and as a Business Mindset Coach in Carolin Soldo’s ‘Brand Your Passions’ Programme.
I’ve been a copywriting for top coaches and a sales funnel creator and offer copy coaching, copywriting and content creation services in addition to coaching.
I love the freedom and flexibility I have in my life now. I love that I am kinder to myself and that I am making time to look after myself and to be creative. I love that I can connect with my daughter and also show her the importance of caring for yourself and doing work that you love.
My Heart-led Work
I work with thoughtful women who want to be the best version of themselves so that they can be a great role model for their children and so that they can feel more fulfilled in their own life. They want to connect with their children and really be there for them and they know that can only happen if they are not worn out and completely frazzled.
I would love to hear from you!
To learn more about how I can help you find more time for you and more connection with your child, check out my Coach With Me Page or send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org