You’re a very responsible person filling your day with lots of responsibilities. Other people can rely on you to get things done. Other people think you have it all together, and yet something’s missing.
You sometimes feel that you’re just going through the motions. There’s a creative and fun part of you that isn’t getting out very much and you’d like to change that.
You know that there’s more to you than you’ve allowed yourself to explore. It’s as though you’re a grown up who’s not quite figured out who they want to be ‘when they grown up.’
You’d like to feel more like YOU again, even if you don’t know what exactly that looks like yet.
You hold yourself back with lack of confidence, self-criticism and seeing your own creativity as frivolous. There are aspects of your life where others see you as hugely confident, but in your heart, it’s not the truth.
Hi, I’m Deborah Chalk,
I know exactly how you feel as I was there too.
Now, I’m a life coach for people who want to be creative and enjoy their life and work more, but they lack confidence, are hard on themselves and feel too busy.
As a result of not being creative and doing the things they want to do, they feel like part of them is missing.
I help them create the inspiring life they want so they feel like they’re reaching their full potential.
The key themes of my coaching work with clients are:
- Creative confidence and permission
- Feeling that you’re enough.
- Identifying and overcoming beliefs that limit you.
- Life purpose
- Self-compassion vs self-pressuring
- Success, that’s fulfilling and sustainable
- Writing and creative expression
- Being an introvert in an extrovert world
- Time management/procrastination/habits/focus
- Law of attraction
- Money beliefs
- Building your business foundation / career change
- Creative inspiration / inner guidance
- Meditation and mindfulness
- Mind body connection
I’ve been reading self-help and coaching books since I was 13. I love to learn and I was really shy, awkward and was bullied at school. I felt like I needed all the help that I could get.
I was very hard on myself and highly responsible. The ‘be a good girl’ thing wasn’t working for me. I was doing what other people wanted for me rather than what I wanted.
I landed up in a job in a Merchant Bank in London and I realised that there was no way I wanted to live my working life there and then retire one day with a carriage clock.
The Navy and teaching were the other ‘responsible’ career choices that I made.
I was unprepared for abseiling down cliffs and nights on Dartmoor in the Navy and I told myself it was beyond my capabilities, so I left.
I was maxed out in my teaching jobs and critical of myself as a teacher even though others thought highly of my ability.
There didn’t seem to be any time to do creative things outside of my teaching responsibilities. I started to take piano lessons while I was teaching in a desperate attempt to reclaim my creativity.
I got married and my husband’s job meant we moved ten times to new parts of England. I would just get settled somewhere and we would move again.
I moved from teaching job to teaching job and each time I felt like I was starting over as each school needed new planning, new ways of doing things and I needed to earn the respect of the parents and pupils all over again.
On one of the moves we got a puppy, a beautiful flat-coated retriever, and I made the decision not to go to the school that had invited me to talk about a term of supply. I chose instead to stay home with the puppy and somehow figure out what I was going to do with the rest of my life.
We went to a party with friends and I went home crying as I didn’t know who I was any more – I felt I had lost my identity as I was no longer a teacher. What could I say when people asked what I did? I was so attached to the label I had on account of my work.
I worked through Julia Cameron’s book ‘The Artist’s Way’ and started to listen to what it was that I wanted in my life.
This was something I’d never done before. I remembered that old part of me, the part of my that wanted to create, the part of me that identified with Jo in ‘Little Women’ and wanted to have a trunk in the attic with my creative work in it.
I had played the lead in two musicals, one aged 17 and one in my early thirties, but then stopped singing as I didn’t believe in my creativity or talent. I stopped music being a part of my life even though it lights me up. I didn’t even sing round the house anymore.
I slowly began to reclaim my creativity. I took courses in floristry and photography and did a second degree in Art History and Creative Writing. I took more piano lessons. I was allowing myself to be the creative person I had been all along, but I still couldn’t figure out what to do with my life.
I worked with a coach and she helped me to recognise that I had been reading coaching books all along and was passionate about coaching and self-development. I hadn’t been allowing myself to train as a coach as I thought the training was too expensive and coaching sounded kind of ‘flaky’.
It wasn’t one of those ‘responsible jobs’ that the good girl part of me thought I had to have.
I became a mother at 36. I’d been married to my husband for ten years at that point, but had never felt settled enough to have a child. My husband was in a job where the hours were really long, we had a couple of scary episodes when my daughter had febrile convulsions. I faced some dark emotional times compounded by lack of sleep.
I worked through Carrie Contey’s Evolve program and on self-care with Lisa Grace Byrne and I started to steady my emotional ship.
Eventually, I built the emotional stability and confidence to do my coach training. In 2013, I took Martha Beck’s Wayfinder Life Coach training. I allowed myself to do something my heart had been calling me to.
I built a business where I can work from home and have balance and creativity in my life. I can go to sports matches at school when I plan for them and am enjoying taking singing lessons. I took grade 5 singing last summer and I’m now working on Grade 5 music theory and Grade 6 practical.
I look after myself with good nutrition, exercise, meditation, time in nature and sleep. I use the Law of Attraction as I create my way of living and being. I continue to work with my own coaches and read self-help books to continue to grow and share what I’ve learnt with my clients.
I no longer have the Sunday night dread that I used to feel about work and instead, I feel on a much more even keel.
I have work that I enjoy, more self-compassion and self-care. I’m still a work in progress, but we all are and always will be.
My coaching experience has involved me working to coach and mentor other coaches and holistic entrepreneurs, mothers, teens and university students, people changing careers and business coaching.
I worked as a career coach for Alison Cardy’s Career Coaching Team (Washington based) and as a Business Mindset Coach in Carolin Soldo’s ‘Brand Your Passions’ Programme. I’m now a Copy Coach Assistant on Jenny Shih’s program ‘Making it Work Online.’
I’ve been a copywriter for top coaches and a sales funnel creator.
I love the freedom and flexibility I have in my life now. I love that I am kinder to myself and that I am making time to look after myself and to be creative.
My work as a coach now focuses on helping you claim that creative part of you and to make it part of your life. I use a combination of coaching, mentoring and teaching to help you to claim that.
I would love to hear from you about your creative dreams!
You can email me at email@example.com to set up a call to chat about the possibility of working together.