Coaches Don’t Live in A Perfect World


Sorry, this isn’t a cheery unicorn filled post. If you want unicorns maybe come back next week when normal cheeriness may be resumed or enjoy the picture above. 🙂

Are you assuming because I’m a life coach that my life must be perfect?

The truth is that coaches don’t live in a perfect world. Not everything goes just right because I’m a coach.

This year has presented challenges for many of us and I have kept some private because as a coach you don’t necessarily have to live your whole life online. You get a choice. Some of the issues have been personal and some more connected to the wider changes and challenges we are all seeing.

I was at the spa last Friday introducing myself to clients as they came for their treatments. I have a cold now and so had the odd cough and splutter. My self-critical self was thinking ‘they must be thinking how can you be a life coach when you can’t even stop yourself from getting a cold?’

‘Shouldn’t you be able to stop yourself getting colds with all the rainbow unicorn energy you coachy folks are meant to have?’

Coaches get colds. Coaches are human. We may help our clients in all sorts of wonderful ways but when it comes down to it we need out own helpers and support in life. Coaching helps for sure.

I knew when my inner critic piped up about the cold that it was just that – the critical part of myself that wants to keep me safe.

This is the same part of me that for years thought that being a coach wasn’t a ‘real’ career because it was a bit too ‘woo woo.’

I was denying the fact that even though I can keep to a schedule and organise and create all sorts of things that the questioning of the soul, the spirit and all that is ‘woo’ is part of me too.

Just so you know, being a ‘nurtured coach’ does not involve wall-to wall-spa treatments.

I am a life coach probably because this thing called living happily didn’t come really easily to me.

I’m an introvert and an overthinker who had a Masters in worry as well as other qualifications.

I suppose you think I never get scared?

I do and sometimes even over silly things when you would imagine that my coach self would help me to deal with anything.

Take the trip this week to the ice-rink for an end of term party. I learnt that sometimes you need to step on the ice at the ice rink even when you might fall flat on your face.

I need to do that in my business too, even when it feels scary.

Even when I don’t know how to skate. I need to put on my skates and step onto the ice.

When I am deeply unsettled by what I see happening, I do what I can in my own small way, to listen and coach and help others in their small corner of the world to do the brave things.

I hold their hands as they step onto the ice of their dreams, when they are wondering if they’ll fall, when they wonder if the ice will crack.

Life coaches don’t get to live in a perfect world just because they become a coach. We see the same hurt, prejudice and violence and there is no way that coaching tools can make sense of all of that. Coaching cannot take away all pain and fear and hurt. It has its limitations.

Maybe Byron Katie would disagree. She finds a way to find the good or transformative in absolutely everything. I also love this post by Jeanette Maw filled with gratitude for the year she has just had on 99 Ways 2016 rocked it.

Coaching has its power. The power which comes from being open to change and possibility and taking step by step action. Power which comes from the value of allowing another human being to be listened to more deeply than they ever have been listened to. The power that comes from helping others to see that they have a choice and they may just have more choice than they might have imagined.

I would love for you to live in a perfect world where your days are filled with joy. Until then it is my privilege to offer you some help and support along the way in an imperfect world.

With love and peace to you this holiday season,