I realise now why I used to end up crying on my birthday through my twenties. It was because of all of the expectation I was putting on myself to have a good time and have the most wonderful day.
You know the song with the line ‘it’s the most wonderful time of the year,’ well talk about putting the pressure on.
The decorations are in the shops from October and then there is the big build up.
Christmas can come with so much expectation that unless all you dreams come true on that day you are left wondering why what is missing is missing.
Now I have learnt that as a sensitive introvert that the big crash and clang brass band of a holiday isn’t for me. So I make it smaller, more intentional, less of a big thing to have every hope and dream pinned on.
When I do this I find it becomes more beautiful and a time of more connection and joy. The day flows more and I am more present to what it brings.
It’s the difference between a gift wrapped in sparkly paper with lights all over it that is ultimately empty and a gift from the heart that will be treasured, wrapped in brown paper and string.
Sometimes I do choose to have a celebration. For one special birthday I went for tea at Claridges in London. I went with my husband and little one. Even on this day I was conscious that I was choosing to celebrate in this way. Tea and cake as sacred ceremony!
As we come into January sometimes we can load ourselves with a whole new load of expectations to be and live a certain way. We think that in one day we can change everything and become a new somehow better version of who we were the day before.
Why not stop instead and take the time to see the beauty of who you are now and how far you have come? Celebrate the beginning of your new journey into and through the year.
Have as your intention the spirit of growth throughout the year, rather than expecting to get to your end point on day one.
It is going to be a beautiful journey to where you will be at the end of 2015. Don’t deny yourself the view across the fields of sunflowers that you will pass on your way.
To start the year:
1) Say thanks to yourself for where you are now and how far you have come. Write a list of what you did in 2014 that really mattered.
2) Plant some seeds, what areas would you like to see growth in. What seeds of action can you plant there and water regularly?
3) What is your vision for the year? In the film ‘Notting Hill’ there is a scene where Hugh Grant’s character walks through a market and it changes through the seasons as he walks from one end of the market to the other.
Get a paper calendar and look at each month’s page. As you do so visualise the growth and change you would like to see in yourself as you make your way through the year.
This is the start of your year’s journey, It’s not meant to be the end.
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